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I don’t know whether this is tragically hilarious or whether it is the beginning of something that may bring me some satisfaction in life, but I have decided to register a business. Yes. The daunting thought of working for another Polish employer has made my guts churn and the only way out is to pretend to be my own boss. The idea is to have a multifaceted scope of business activity, so in my business registry description I have included the following:

• Paper production and production of paper goods
• Textile design and printing (?)
• Translating
• Publishing (?)
• Foreign language tuition
• Research in economic, legal, financial fields
• Legal advice and consulting
• Freelance journalism
• Transport provider (!)

I thought about adding forestry and dairy production but I think you need permits for those.

Ok, so the only serious bit is the legal advice service and the translating, but here in Poland you can really eliminate a lot of taxation issues when opening up a business by broadening the business activity. And maybe one day I will publish some really kick ass comic book drawn by some up and coming artist and drive him around to the paper mills, whilst correcting his English dicton. For now I just have to find some clients.

In the meantime I will continue to look for foreign companies investing in Poland who will take me on board.

But the best bit about registering the business is the name. After some brainstorming with Tabitha over Skype and later over a beer or two with Michal and Tukan, the name of the self-employment venture will be “WOGUS Inc.”!! The ‘us’ makes it sound Polish (since the ‘w’ is pronounced as a ‘v’) and the ‘wog’ part will just make me piss my pants continuously.

For my Polish readers, you just have to trust me that the ‘wog’ part is probably highly inappropriate and that I would never be able to get away with it in Sydney.

If any of you however have other suggestions, please feel free to comment. The registration part is happening this Friday so there is still a day or two to make the name more ridiculous.